Magazin On The Secrets Of Selling

Good deeds and merits cannot be actually measured and valued. A penny given from the heart can worth more than millions contributed in the eyes of Heaven. A glass of water is more valuable than millions of dollars for a person dying of thirst. Likewise a packet of rice is worth more than gold for people dying of food or in time of war where hunger is everywhere. For a simple work of art like painting, it can be sold through auctioning in the millions. For e-auctioning, almost anything can be found in eBay.

For anything to reach success, Lao Tzu said, “A journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step.” I have also heard that it was only about ten years ago, Yahoo had only 200 registered websites and now in the billions. Amazon started in a two-room place selling books, and now the sales in the billions. The power of the modern day e-commerce is no doubt building many billionaires like Bill Gates who made the right choice to pursue his Microsoft idea than to complete his studies. Likewise in Malaysia, many uneducated but brainy businessmen made it in life in terms of wealth and success in the corporate world.

Lao Tzu said, “Anything of significant scale has seemingly insignificant beginning. Similarly, the sacred cause of the universal propagation of Tao has very humble beginnings.” The Tao of Heaven movement initially from China has grown over the last fifty years and now covers all major continents of the world. The movement today continues to grow and thrive at tremendous rate. Like the spring water that flows ceaselessly, Tao has nourished and quenched the thirst of those yearning for spiritual development and Truth. It is like the lightning that comes from the east and flashes to the west. The speed that covers everywhere is like e-auctioning and surprisingly, it coincides with Jesus’ foretelling on the coming of the Son of Man nearing the end of the age (Matthew 24:27), that, “For just as the lightning comes from the east and flashes to the west, so shall the coming of the Son of Man be.”

In Malaysia alone, a single Malaysian Tao Master under “Grand Master Han” from China has more than 800 house temples under his care. There are more than 800,000 followers under various Tao Masters in Malaysia in less than 30 years. In Singapore, “Grand Master Ho” from China has more than 1,500 apartment temples and there are 18 Grand Masters of Tao from China under the Heavenly Master JiGong. In United States there is a very huge website propagating Tao of Heaven in many languages under “Grand Master Han.”

Tao practitioners in the West and Australia are in the millions. Unfortunately the messages from Heaven are mainly in Mandarin and there are limited translations into English. The present shortage of reference and reading materials on Tao of Heaven for the English reading people hindered the propagation and my regular submission of articles is trying to fill up part of this gap. Hopefully readers will also click to my website for more contents and teachings of Tao of Heaven and they can be redirected to the website in the United States. Whether it can reach the level of success like eBay is God’s will. Knowing the shortfall, I have named my first three books, “May it be Heaven’s will” as the headline. Through the speed faster than light I hope people of the world would like to find out what is this teaching of Tao of Heaven and the Third Eye or The Right Portal that are so important in life. Let me quote a report from the United States in the Sunday Times.

“United States researchers believe they have discovered a ‘God spot’ in the brain - a circuit of nerves which could explain humanity’s almost universal belief in a deity. A study of epileptics who said they had experienced profoundly spiritual states revealed that a spot in the front of the brain appeared to become electrically active when they thought about God. The study compared epileptic patients with normal people and a group who said they were intensely religious. Research is at an early stage, but the scientists said the results appeared to show that the phenomenon of religious belief could be inbuilt in humans.”

The research demonstrates that there are immense fields of energy which seem to be originating from “a spot in front of the brain” when people undergo such transcendental experiences. In the teachings of Tao of Heaven, this spot in front of the brain is what we described as The Divine Eye or where the soul resides. During the time of Sakyamuni Buddha, the transmission of Tao was done by “eye to eye contact” using the unseen wave like electronic to pass on the essence of Tao and the Heavenly Decree. The famous words used by Sakyamuni Buddha when he was transmitting the Heavenly Decree to “Mahakasyapa” was “I have the true dharma hidden in my eye,” looking at Mahakasyapa by rolling a golden lotus flower in front of his eyes. The magic of David Copperfield where I have incorporated on my website is able to read people’ mind to prove that there is something mystical and divine when it comes to the mind of man.

This humble website of mine was created earlier with the aim to disseminate the teachings of Tao of Heaven at lightning speed to those with affinity because printing of books is costly and hard to find an International Publisher or Distributor. After eight months it has achieved overwhelming results and if the speed of growth is consistent, maybe the success can be in the same path as eBay and others mentioned above. Always look forward with positive attitude, persevere and don’t give up in your endeavor in any good thing you do or your business.

Author: T.A Chew

T.A Chew first read about eBay about a year ago in early 2005 when he started on his website. Likewise on Amazon, Yahoo, Google…they are not really that long in business but now in billions dollars business. About ten years ago, Goddess of Mercy said that the “money” to come is uncountable, but in this case the “money” should be the merits in terms of disseminating Tao. Website: http://www.white-sun.com

If you have a website and desires to attract traffic and
and to make your visitors visit you again and again, then listen up, buddy.

Below are a few website promotion ideas and the secrets:

1. Polls

Hold an interactive poll on your web site. Ask visitors a poll
question. Have them e-mail their vote or opinion. People love
to give their 2 cents worth. They would also like to read the
results the next day or week on your web site.

2. Prize Drawings

Hold an ongoing prize drawing on your web site. The prizes
should be something of interest or value to your subscribers.
Most people who enter will continually revisit your web site
to get the results.

3. Original Content

Give your visitors content they can’t read anywhere else.
I’m not saying all your content has to be 100% original, but a
portion of your web site should have original information.
People will usually read information they haven’t read before.

4. Quizes

Give your visitors a quiz or a series of trivia questions. Post
the correct answers weekly on your web site. The people
who participate will want to come back to your site to see
if they were right.

5. News

Supply news stories related to your web site topic. People
want current and up-to-date news. If you can be their first
source, they will become repeat visitors to your web site.

6. Jokes

Give your visitors a little humor now and then. Don’t be so
serious; tell them a joke. If they associate your web site with
being happy they will visit again and again.

7. Free Stuff

People love to get free stuff. List free stuff on your web site.
It could be software, services, sample products, e-books etc.
The freebies should be related to your web site topic. Keep
the freebies coming and your visitors will return regulary.

8. Directories

Tell your subscribers about Web sites related to your web
site topic. The web sites should be interesting and helpful.
Become your readers web site directory and they will come
back.

May these website promotion ideas and secrets help you to
make a lot of money.

Warmly,

I-key Benney, CEO

I-key, a Millionaire CEO from New York City is the creator of “Mscsrrr: Millionaire Secret Cash System”,(investing online ) program, which has helped thousands of ordinary people from all over the world to attain financial security and shining success during the past 2 yrs.

Mscsrrr Millionaire Cash System helps you to generate $1,500+/Week for life, from home or office, part time or full time. No large investment or hassles. Win $1000-$2000 free “cash”…

Many men have found bass fishing quite a relaxing experience. Although Bass fish have been known to be quite a fighter and a struggler the sheer excitement of waiting and finally snagging it releases certain chemicals into the body that provides a euphoric feeling making the experience all worthwhile and satisfying.

Many men and women have come back from a bass fishing expedition feeling light and perky even though they have been outdoors the whole time. The strenuous activity seems to have recharged their bodies.

The popularity Bass fishing has garnered over the years has grown to an all time high with more and more people discovering its joys. Some though are reluctant to start because they have not got a single shred of idea on what to do. Here are some tips to get you started and some secret to act like an experienced bass fish catcher.

Baits

Artificial baits have been known to catch quite a few Bass! You can also use baitfish, such as a mullet, with much more visually attractive artificial bait over it or with its backbone removed so that it swims more naturally and with a 2-ounce egg sinker on the hook to keep it just under the waves.

Approach

The best way to get a surface fish, as in any other fishing, is to be sure you keep your distance. Fishing down the creek would help if the water flow is fairly decent. It doesn’t have to be a lot but enough to keep your bait moving. If there are any bushes, trees, or shrubs around try to hide behind them then cast your line in (fly fishing rods are great for this matter).

But remember, to quietly sneak up to them. Any hole with a lot of fish in a river or creek takes a lot of patience. If they hear or see you, you’ll probably not get any bites. Also look for rocks around the creek. If the soil is moist or damp, lift up the rocks and you may find some native worms. .

For night time bass use a black jitterbug. Replace the hooks with better hooks and if there’s no moon then use some sort of glow in the dark paint on the under side of the lure or they will miss it a lot.

If you have lily pads in a spot or two, then the best advice if it is deep is to run a worm or any soft bait slowly along the bottom right next to the lily pads. You can also buy plastic frogs and mice to skip along the top of the lily pads.

Location

Water weeds extending about five feet out into the water are a very good source of bass cover. You can run any kind of artificial bait along the edge of them and usually snag one or two. Or you can put a weed less worm right in the middle of the weeds.

Try to look for underwater structures like big rocks and big stumps. They serve as cover for the bass. Try all the kinds of lures that you can. Cast in one area around five times just to see if there is any fish that need teasing.

If you catch a fish DON’T LEAVE THAT SPOT stay there and fish more after you have removed the hook. Fish will follow the fish on your line and try to steal the bait. Especially if it is white bass you can sometimes catch two at a time with crappie and perch that is if you have a double rig.

Worms usually work well during light to heavy over cast skies and spinners usually work better in the morning when the sun is reflecting off the water. When you set the hook, try to keep your line tight and maybe even give it another set. When they jump it is real hard to keep your line tight.

Make sure you aren’t using dull hooks. Also, smaller hooks can penetrate easier, making them harder to throw. In most instances, though, nothing beats an aggressive hook set, and then keeping steady pressure on the fish, especially when they go airborne.

The Practical Bass Fishing Tips for a Successful Fishing Experience

Many men has found bass fishing quite a relaxing experience. Although Bass fish have been known to be quite a fighter and a struggler the sheer excitement of waiting and finally snagging it releases certain chemicals into the body that provides a euphoric feeling making the experience all worthwhile and satisfying.

Many men and women have come back from a bass fishing expedition feeling light and perky even though they have been outdoors the whole time. The strenuous activity seems to have recharged their bodies.

The popularity Bass fishing has garnered over the years has grown to an all time high with more and more people discovering its joys. Some though are reluctant to start because they have not got a single shred of idea on what to do. Here are some tips to get you started and some secret to act like an experienced bass fish catcher.

Baits

Artificial baits have been known to catch quite a few Bass! You can also use baitfish, such as a mullet, with much more visually attractive artificial bait over it or with its backbone removed so that it swims more naturally and with a 2-ounce egg sinker on the hook to keep it just under the waves.

Approach

The best way to get a surface fish, as in any other fishing, is to be sure you keep your distance. Fishing down the creek would help if the water flow is fairly decent. It doesn’t have to be a lot but enough to keep your bait moving. If there are any bushes, trees, or shrubs around try to hide behind them then cast your line in (fly fishing rods are great for this matter).

But remember, to quietly sneak up to them. Any hole with a lot of fish in a river or creek takes a lot of patience. If they hear or see you, you’ll probably not get any bites. Also look for rocks around the creek. If the soil is moist or damp, lift up the rocks and you may find some native worms. .

For night time bass use a black jitterbug. Replace the hooks with better hooks and if there’s no moon then use some sort of glow in the dark paint on the under side of the lure or they will miss it a lot.

If you have lily pads in a spot or two, then the best advice if it is deep is to run a worm or any soft bait slowly along the bottom right next to the lily pads. You can also buy plastic frogs and mice to skip along the top of the lily pads.

Location

Water weeds extending about five feet out into the water are a very good source of bass cover. You can run any kind of artificial bait along the edge of them and usually snag one or two. Or you can put a weed less worm right in the middle of the weeds.

Try to look for underwater structures like big rocks and big stumps. They serve as cover for the bass. All I can say is try all the kinds of lures that you can. I usually cast in one area around five times just to see if there is any fish that need teasing.

If you catch a fish DON’T LEAVE THAT SPOT stay there and fish more after you have removed the hook. Fish will follow the fish on your line and try to steal the bait. Especially if it is white bass you can sometimes catch two at a time with crappie and perch that is if you have a double rig.

Worms usually work well during light to heavy over cast skies and spinners usually work better in the morning when the sun is reflecting off the water. When you set the hook try to keep your line tight and maybe even give it another set that’s how I do it but usually it only takes one set. When they jump it is real hard to keep your line tight.

Make sure you aren’t using dull hooks, first of all. Also, sometimes smaller hooks can penetrate easier, making them harder to throw. In most instances, though, nothing beats an aggressive hook set, and then keeping steady pressure on the fish, especially when they go airborne.

Rent movie is the best way to save your time money and energy. Rent movie makes your night brighten and you can enjoy any movie at home with your family. Movies are a good source to share conversations with your family. Its good way to relax with your favorite show from your dull and stressful day.

The great thing is renting movie is an online renting without hassles of traveling which makes more convenient for the movie lover. If you are an regular movie watcher then its good to take an yearly membership with any rental movie provider. Where the rental charges for you will be lesser then a then person without membership . Once your membership is live the movie of your choice will be easily available for you and its more convenient when everyone from family has different choice.

Online rental movie offers many plans so that it will be more convenient for everyone to get the movie of their choice. Many online movie rental companies have facility of keeping a movie for a longer period on their members request, so members can enjoy every movie with in a affordable prices and without not much searching for any of their favorite movie.

Rent movie web is really convenient as its an time saver and you can e
asily get the movie of your choice and when you rent movie online, simply with a click of a button you send your movies back through mail and select your next rental movie online, then you just have to wait for a day and they appear in your mailbox.

Great advantage of online movie rental, is you easily get diversity and the number of title which cant not be easily found at any movie stores. Many people prefer online movie rental because its really makes this process easy and affordable. To get apart from yourself from your busy schedule its an good way to get relaxed and enjoy movie with our family sitting at home.

I am Free Lance writer and currently for this website http://www.rent-movie.info I have just started to write article and press releases which are related to this mentioned site. This article is prepared on the basis of reliable sources. If you find any error or mistake in this article please email us immediately at this email address annajosephs@gmail.com so that we can take immediate action.

Rent Movie

Introduction:

Of all the important decisions that go into a successful Pay Per Click Advertising program, the most critical one is which keywords to target. Choosing the right keywords will drive a continuous stream of qualified buyers to your site at affordable CPC’s. Choosing the wrong keywords will negate even the most well planned Pay Per Click Advertising strategy.

Going Beyond The Obvious:

At first glance, choosing keywords for your Pay Per Click Advertising program seems easy. Anyone can come up with a list of obvious keywords related to their web site. The problem is, because the keywords are obvious, all your competitors have come up with the same list of words. This can lead to price inflation for these keywords on the Pay Per Click Search Engines, making it difficult for anyone to profit from these keywords. The key to a successful PPC Advertising strategy is to identify targeted, hard to find, niche keywords that drive profitable traffic to your site.

Monetizing The “Keyword Tail”

The enormous number of queries that fall outside the obvious keywords is known as the “Keyword Tail”. An advertiser’s ability to mine the “Keyword Tail” for profitable nuggets of Search terms is often the difference between a successful Pay Per Click Advertising program, and one that loses money.

Examples of keywords that fall into the “Keyword Tail” are singular, plural, and misspelled versions of keywords, and keyword terms related to the obvious keywords for your site. For example, if you own a site that sells fishing supplies, you may come up with the following list of keywords:

Obvious Keyword: Fishing

“Keyword Tail”: Fly Fishing Equipment

Fly Fishing Gear

Fishing Lures

Fishing Reels

Many of the Pay Per Click Search Engines offer tools to help advertisers identify hard to find keywords related to their sites. Overture’s is the most advanced in this area, but Google’s works well too. The leading third party tool to help advertisers uncover profitable keywords is offered by a company called WordTracker. WordTracker not only helps identify good keywords for your Pay Per Click Advertising program, but it also tells you how many times the words were searched on across all the major Search Engines. This is important, because the more niche the keyword, the less traffic it will generate. It doesn’t do any good to find a perfectly targeted keyword if it only generates a few clicks a month.

Because each targeted, niche, keyword by definition will only produce a small amount of traffic, it’s important to identify as many as possible so their combined traffic will have a meaningful impact on your Pay Per Click Advertising program.

Summary:

The beauty of Pay Per Click Advertising is the more targeted the keyword, the less you’ll likely have to pay for each click. This is opposite of how every other form of advertising works. If you use direct mail, magazines, TV, or even other forms of online advertising to market your products, the prices rise as the audience becomes more targeted.

To succeed you must take advantage of this unique dynamic of Pay Per Click Advertising by using every available tool to help you think “out of the box” to create a comprehensive, targeted list of keywords to drive a steady volume of profitable traffic to your web site.

Stan Hauser is a leading expert in internet advertising, with a particular emphasis on Search Engine Pay Per Click Advertising. He has worked in senior management roles at a top 10 Media Metrix property for over seven years, and is the creator of http://www.pay-per-click-advertising-guide.com

This is a fresh, crisp salad that is also good for the heart. This tasty salad goes well with just about any meat, poultry, fish or pasta dish.

Recipe:

1 red Pepper

1 Yellow Pepper

1/2 Cucumber

1/4 Red Onion

1 C. Black Olives or Green Olives

4 Roma Tomatoes

3 T. Chopped Garlic

1/2 C. Fresh Herbs

3/4 C. Baslamic Vinegar

Salt and Pepper

Instructions:

Chop and slice all of the above vegetables to desired size. Add Baslamic Vinegar and salt & pepper to taste. Throw into an airtight container. Allow to marinate for at least one hour in the refrigerator.

Make this salad about you, and your love of fresh vegetables. I tend to slice all of mine into julienne strips. But what works for me may not work for you.

Serving Suggestions:

Serve over a bed of cold pasta.

Serve over a bed of fresh greens.

Serve with grilled fish or poultry.

Add some cubed cooked chicken.

Tips From Chef Bek:

- The longer your salad marinates, the better the flavor.

- Julienne: Slice vegetable into 2-inch x 1/4-inch slices. Stack the slices and cut into lengthwise 1/8-inch or 1/4-inch strips.

- When chopping garlic, toss about 1/4 teaspoon of kosher salt into the mixture. This will keep your garlic from dancing around the cutting board.

- Dried herbs can be substituted for fresh. (when using fresh herbs in a recipe, use 3 times as much as you would use of a dried herb)

- Don’t have Balsamic Vinegar; replace it with your favorite Fat Free Italian Dressing.

——

Bek Davis is a trained chef and a work at home mom. You can find more recipes, cooking tips, and mom resources on her highly recommended websites:
http://modernmomnetwork.com, http://www.iwebdesigns.org, and http://free-recipes-reprint.blogspot.com.

>> Use this recipe upon your site. You must keep the above BIO attached!

When you think of a web portal, who do you think of? Yahoo, Lycos, Altavista, and others, perhaps? Did you know that you

could create your own that people would want to go to? Well you can! In this article you will find many different ways to

enhance your website and create a web portal.

=======================
1. Your primary content
=======================
Your primary content is important when starting your own web portal. It’s the core of your website and it’s what your

visitors see first. In addition to your own content, there are many different options when it cones to choosing where you get

your content from. One great source is SubPortal.com. With SubPortal.com you get everything you need, all co-branded with

your logo. It comes fully loaded with news, weather, comics, a download section, online games, and more. Also, if you only

need news or weather on your site, you can try Moreover.com for news and Weather.com has different weather forecasting

options available for your site.

=========================
2. Your secondary content
=========================
Your secondary content is also important to your web portal’s development. You have a number of choices when it comes to your

secondary content:
For your own e-greeting card service, go to Regards.com
For your own search engine, go to Curryguide.com and look for the VSE.
For a free e-mail service, try Everyone.net or Bigmailbox.com.
For a free MP3 search box, try eMP3 finder.com
These are only a few suggestions as to what your seconday content can be.

==================
3. Add a web store
==================
One way to make money for your web portal is to add a web store. At Cafepress.com, you can add you logo or any image to a

wide variety of product for sale. They set a base price and you can set your price higher than their base price to earn a

commission from the sales. You can also go through Amazon.com and earn a commission selling books from your site.

Using these techniques you should begin to create your own web portal and maintain it. Keep searching the web for more

content and helpful services that your visitors will enjoy.

About the Author

Dearrick Goodfriend is the owner and webmaster for www.WebWorldSearch.com, an internet portal with a search engine, free e-mail, e-greeting cards, and much more.

There is a common misconception that an “online business” requires no investment…that you can make money online without spending any.

When we hear this from people who are desparately trying to build a successful online business it makes us angry!

We believe the misconception is primarily due to all of the hype and false promises that arrive daily in our inboxes. Emails promising us that we can make millions of dollars with no financial output while we sit at home and do nothing. It’s insane and it’s not the truth.

The truth is that you must treat an online business just as you would a business in the conventional world. You must plan on investing time, money and effort to ensure your success. The good news is that your investment in an online business will be MUCH, MUCH less than that of a business in the conventional world.

With an online business, there are essentials that you must have in order for your business to run smoothly and become successful. You can literally run an effective online business for $100-$200 a month. But first…

Here are six essentials that you MUST have to run your online business.

1. Your Own Website

This includes a domain name and web hosting for your site. You must have a central place to send your customers, even if you are selling multiple products or services.

2. A Professional Autoresponder

An absolute MUST for any online business. If you’re not using an autoresponder, you’re losing money! That’s the bottom line. Your autoresponder should have the ability to create subscriptions via email and web form and should be a professional one with no ads! Fr~e autoresponders look unprofessional and they are not reliable.

3. Ad Tracker

This is probably the most underused tool that we know of. Consider this - most people who are NOT making money on the Net have never used an Ad Tracker. Yet, ALL of the people that we know who ARE making money on the Net - use one daily. It makes no sense to spend money and time on advertising if you’re not going to be able to determine which ads are producing and which ones are not. An Ad Tracker will solve this problem and save you time and money in the long run.

4. Products or Services

You must have something to sell! This can be a service such as web or graphic design, an mlm/affiliate program or products, tangible or digital. If you don’t have a specific product or service in mind, there are thousands of profitable digital products that come with resell rights. This means you can resell them and keep 100% of the profit!

5. You must know HOW and WHERE to advertise to bring targeted prospects to your Website!

You can save yourself a tremendous amount of time, money and frustration by learning the effective advertising methods that are available online. There are countless worthless ones that are simply a waste of time. If you’re new online, you won’t know this unless you find someone who is successful online and follow their lead. Find a mentor or a membership site that offers step by step Tutorials on online promotion. Make sure that the tutorials are updated frequently to keep up with the changing times of the Internet!

6. Leads

The lifeline of any online business! Just because you have a website and products to sell, that doesn’t mean you’re going to make money! To make money, you must drive targeted visitors to your website. There are THOUSANDS of companies on the web that sell Leads but if you just pick one out of the blue, it’s trial and error. Do some research and find a good source for leads. Again, you can achieve this by finding someone who is succcessful and following their lead. Or join a membership site that includes Leads as a part of their package.

So there you have it. With these six essentials, you’ve got the foundation for a successful online business. Without them, it’s going to be a tough road ahead. Use them as a “checklist” and make sure your online business is armed for success!

Charles & Susan Truett are experienced internet marketers
who have built a successful online business and are now
teaching others how to achieve the same success. For more
more info on how to make money at home visit:
www.partnersinsuccess.net

Copyright The Quipping Queen 2005.

IT’S SEPTEMBER SILLY!

Or, 30 thrilling things to do this month!

Compiled by Lady Beatrice Blitterlees and edited by Lord Earl Craboon

September is the 9th month of the year. No one has a clue why they call it “Sept”ember meaning “seventh” in French, instead of “Neuf” meaning “ninth”.

Obviously “The Association for the Correct Name of Things” hasn’t got around to fixing this error. They have many more important things to do, such as coming up with a name for the newest planet in the solar system.

Anyway, “neuf” or not, remember to get the little nippers off to school on time, and then hot-foot into work with a perky smile on your face before your boss hands you a pink slip this month.

Well now that we’ve got all that yucky-pooh stuff out of the way, we can all begin to have some fun. After all, we’ve only got another couple of months before celebrating Halloween, Thanksgiving and the biggest gift-giving bonanza of them all!

In the meantime, we’ll just practice our prattle n’ puck skills this month just to limber up for the good times ahead.

So without further whatnot and wherefore, just join in and have a ball over the next 30 days doing what comes naturally.

SNICKERING EVENTS & CELEBRATIONS FOR THE MONTH OF SEPTEMBER

September 1: National No Footwear Day (Sponsored by the “Kid-in-All-Of-Us” & “Pleasure-Seeking Podiatrists Association of America”)

September 2: Virgo Appreciation Day (Time to honor all those cranky, dogmatic, eccentric, over-demanding, prudish, untidy yet earthy potted plant lover types you know)

September 3: Ever Wonder What the Romans Did When the Coliseum Was Closed Day (An excellent time to design & build your fuel-efficient soap-box derby vehicle)

September 4: National Back-To-School Pencil Sharpening Tournament (A “must” for every parent, student, and teacher…that leaves the rest of us off the hook thank god!)

,b>September 5: Apple Polishing Day (For those who don’t like kissing butts!)

September 6: Loose Goose & Moose Appreciation Day (Every household, organization, and neighborhood has at least one of these rare beasts - shake their hands!)

September 7: Say the Magic Word Day (Choose your name …and ask who has the key to opening “Pandora’s Box” or “Sesame’s”)

September 8: National Adopt-A-Mail Box Day (Time to honor the snail mail postal service in your neighborhood by giving your blessed box a funky name)

September 9: International One-Foot Marathon Day (Let’s see if the entire planet can jump up and down on one foot without complaining or making everything go tilt)

September 10: Is Your Biological Clock Ticking on Time Day? (Time to calibrate your internal clock - can you tell when 5 minutes is up without looking at a watch?)

September 11: Ancestor Story-Telling Day (Time to trot out the old family photo album and hear those tacky tales about Great Uncle Hoo-Hoo and Granny Weeple)

September 12: Grant Me One Wish Day (If the Wizard of Wit & Wonder said you could choose one warm and fuzzy thing…what would it be besides hiking across Antarctica with the love of your life?)

September 13: Funny Money Awareness Day (Time to see how many vendors will accept poker chips, Monopoly game money, or Canadian Tire coupons in lieu of the real thing?)

September 14: Silent Screen Appreciation Day (Time to turn your boob-tube off and twiddle your fingers, go for a walk, talk to a tree or a pet, or play a smashing game of marbles).

September 15: Duct Tape Appreciation Day (In honor of all the wonderful things you can do with this stuff that’s never appeared in a handy-man’s guide to building a birdhouse)

September 16: National “Wing It” Day (Time to join the “improv” group at work, at home, or in your neighborhood just to see the look on everyone’s faces!)

September 17: National Seat-Swapping Day (In honor of those who can’t sing a note, can’t do the bunny hop, and can’t walk on water …but adore playing “Musical Chairs”)

September 18: Sir Galahad Appreciation Day (What would the Round Table be without the best carpet knight in town?)

September 18: Little Bo Peep Appreciation Day (In honor of leaders who appear to have lost their flock, haven’t got a clue where to find them, let alone what to say to bring them back into the fold …other than enjoying the benefits of a great new MLM product)

September 19: Power Napping Recognition Day (Time to honor what gets most of the plebes, pundits and power-brokers through the day without loosing their cool or their marbles)

September 20: The Dog Ate My Assignment/Project Day (Time to honor every excuse given in the book as to why something wasn’t delivered on time, sponsored by EROS - the Excuse-Ridden Organization of Sloths)

September 21: Bat Woman, Bionic Woman & Xena Warrior Day (What would the world be without these indefatigable feisty feline fighters for freedom from kitchen duties if you please!)

September 22: Autumn Leaf Recognition Day (Time to hunt for the biggest frigging dead leaf you can find; dry it out, mount it on some paper and hang it on a wall - frankly it’s better than an etching, and you can call yourself a nature-lover if anyone cares to ask)

September 23: Popcorn & Bubble-Bath Day (When all is said and done…it’s really the little things in life that count …so stock up on them and then chill out for at least one day!)

September 24: Humdinger Appreciation Day (Time to reveal some awesome, extraordinary, or striking person or thing that you encountered in your life that made you go ‘Wow’, ‘Whew’, ‘Whoa’ or whatnot)

September 25: National Doorknob Appreciation Day (A very overlooked little device that most of take for granted until we knock on a door without one!)

September 26: Tooth Fairy Awareness Day (In honor of all folks who hide their lost teeth under their pillows hoping that a pixie will drop by with the name of an affordable, pain-free dentist in the neighborhood)

September 27: Faucet Fetish Day (Time to check out all the plumbing boutiques to find the perfect faucet for one’s high-tech, soothing ablution center in one’s simple abode)

September 28: National Procrastination Day (Recognizes those who’ve made a vital contribution to the 360 degree “yes-but” feedback process, or demonstrated a singularly dedicated response to the amazing feat of optimizing the inevitable status quo)

September 29: Pennies-From-Heaven Day (Time to pay your favorite bills with your favorite copper coins of the realm!)

September 30: Naughty Foreign Word Day (What they don’t teach you on those foreign language tapes - Merde! …if you don’t know one…ask any toddler!)
About the Author

B. Blitterlees & E. Craboon can be found at the Court of The Quipping Queen

Not really considered an art by most people buying and selling used cars can be put down to a fine art, at least in my eyes it can. I have been buying used alfa romeo tspark’s for years - buying them cheap in online auctions etc then selling them on for a good solid profit. This works and is easily replicated, but when I moved onto french cars I was disappointed to see that despite my best efforts buying and selling used citroens for sale was a lot, lot more difficult. Maybe its because they start off life as lesser value cars, or maybe its just the french designs age a lot more than the stylish italian alfa romeos…I am really unsure but its a shame…I will stick to used alfa romeos!